When I see that Amazon has SSDs on sale for 40% off.
When I read the requirements for using indexed views.
When we ask the SAN team if they see any problems on their side… (HT @BorisHristov)
When I attend a Brent Ozar Unlimited conference pre-con, and they throw in free video training classes for all attendees
When the data “architect” wants to create a single denormalized table 120 columns wide (HT @Justadayito)
When I get the last available seat in Brent Ozar Unlimited’s training class
When my junior DBA runs a full backup in the middle of the work day
When I Google for a database error message that I’m getting, and there are exactly zero results
When we do the code review and I see a table aliased as bdsm
When the Unix sysadmin sees Microsoft SQL Server is back on top of the TPC-H 3TB and 10TB results
When the Microsoft presenter tells me that Hekaton is limited to 250GB of data
When I take the other job offer
When I see dynamic SQL that builds dynamic SQL that builds dynamic tables
DBAcognition: Just relaxing at the beach and you SENSE that someone is messing with a production server. (HT @Peter_Shire)
When I politely point out to an overly irate user that their current blocking problem is due to one of their other processes leaving a transaction open. (HT BinarySpartan)